Today I was going through my computer, sorting out files, and I found this old Word document. It was written when I first started this blog, and was a draft for a post I wanted to make, but never did. Anyway I figured, why not post it? It’s kind of a weird story, and when I read it, it gave me this kind of odd feeling. Like I can see how much I’ve grown but also I was a little sad, since such a small event did end one of my friendships. I’ve edited it a little bit, but you can still enjoy my annoyed 20 year old self writing style. Enjoy~
So I’ve never really been a fan of social media, particularly Facebook. I didn’t end up getting a Facebook account until I was nearly 18 and it was out of necessity. Since I dislike going on in the first place, I tend to be quite sensitive when things happen on Facebook – like fights or pointed comments . Which is one of the reason I’m really bad on Twitter >_< (Sorry~) So since something weird happened that I’ve been ruminating over, I thought I might share it, mainly to get a load off my mind before Christmas.
So yesterday I logged into my Facebook account. I wanted to check my messages and any updates so I wouldn’t have to check during Christmas or the New Year ( I check like once a fortnight). I got a notification saying I had a message request, I’d never seen anything like this, so stupidly I clicked on it. I then found I had a message request from my friend’s boyfriend. Let’s call him…Tim. So I met Tim once, 3 years ago, and had never spoken to him since. We weren’t even Facebook friends. When I met him 3 years ago, I was with some other friends, and he refused to even tell us his name. He kept asking us to guess, and we never guessed it, so he never told us.
So Tim was messaging me about this game I liked to play called ‘ Fire Emblem: Awakening’. I had been talking about it to my friend 3 MONTHS AGO. So now 3 months later, my friend must have mentioned to her boyfriend that I enjoyed playing it, and so in his passive-aggressive mind thought that he absolutely must message me to tell me what a terrible game it was. He sent me this really long message about how awful the game is compared to the original games, that the “recruitment stories were trash” and pretty much was ‘educating’ me that I shouldn’t be playing the game as female because the game objectifies women. But it’s totally fine that he plays it. What really shocked me about this was that, this guy would have had to ask my friend what my full name was, go searching for me and then actually message me. As my friend wasn’t on Social media, he wouldn’t be able to find me through her friends list.
Furthermore I couldn’t understand why my friend would bring this up in convo, let alone how, all I can imagine is something like “oh you know that girl you met once 3 years ago, she likes that game you hate”. But even then, how would he think it was normal or reasonable to then message me about it? What’s probably the most hurtful was that I played this game a lot during a really tough time in my life and it helped me get through it. To be honest, in a strange way, when he insulted this game where the characters were like my own family, it was like he was insulting me. I actually felt a little bit odd about my friend’s behaviour. The one time we talked about the game, I was really excited about it, and explaining how it helped me when I was really down in the dumps. I felt a little betrayed (?)
It’s kind of interesting to look back on instances like this in hindsight. When I first received this message I had major anxiety, especially in regards to social media, so in my really emotional state, I was really upset by this message. If I received a message from him now, I wouldn’t reply, but I wouldn’t get upset either. It’s interesting that this really did end up causing a rift between my friend and I. She never mentioned what happened, and neither did I, but I always felt like anything I said would be repeated back to her boyfriend for him to judge. Two years on, the two of them are still together, but I only know what’s going on with her through Snapchat. There isn’t really a moral to this story besides common sense: Don’t message your girlfriend’s friend who you met once 3 years ago, to tell her that the game she likes is shit.